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Cubic Zirconia wedding ring??? - 10/21/2008 12:07:34 PM
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mrtigger
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Disclaimer: This isn't me...
If a guy proposed with an engagement ring which he tells you is diamond but it really isn't (like Cubic Zirconia or similar) and you later found out the truth about it, what would you do?
Be hurt?? End the relationship? Accept it anyway?? Or what??
Would you be ok with a CZ ring if he was up front regarding what the ring was made from??
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RE: Cubic Zirconia wedding ring??? - 10/21/2008 12:31:40 PM
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agapetos
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quote:
Be hurt?? Absolutely.
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End the relationship? Accept it anyway?? Possibly end the relationship, I'd certainly be giving it a lot of thought. Depends which side of the wedding the deception was discovered.
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Or what?? If I didn't end the relationship, he'd never pull a stunt like that again.
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Would you be ok with a CZ ring if he was up front regarding what the ring was made from?? Absolutely ~ though I'm not really into conventional engagement rings.
As jesuschick said, it's the man I'd be marrying, not the ring, but it's a lie. Makes ya wonder.
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RE: Cubic Zirconia wedding ring??? - 10/21/2008 12:32:06 PM
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OneOfHisJewels
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I was pretty much gonna say what Jesuschick says.
The ring is not the problem...the deception is. I actually admire someone who doesn't try to buy what they cannot afford.
I had a coworker who had a cubic zirconia engagement ring in her wedding set, but I never knew it until she told me, and NO, I DID NOT ASK.
After I saw a show on TV what landmines for diamonds in Africa did to the children there, I kind of got to the point where I decided I wanted some other kind of stone(maybe not cubic zirconia..but emerald or sapphire or something).
So, to recap..if this gentleman had honestly told the the woman what it was and why, that would be ok, lying however, is not ok.
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RE: Cubic Zirconia wedding ring??? - 10/21/2008 5:56:05 PM
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laughinggirl
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Personally, I would rather have had a small diamond than a large CZ. To me, there is symbolism in having the real thing, however small. That's just personal preference, though.
The LIE is the real problem. Not cool, ever.
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RE: Cubic Zirconia wedding ring??? - 10/21/2008 9:22:31 PM
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Acts29
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I would be hurt and I would be mad about the deceit. I also agree I would rather have a small diamond than a large cz. It also gives me pause if he is not trying to make a big impression to others with something that is false.
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RE: Cubic Zirconia wedding ring??? - 10/21/2008 9:39:26 PM
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creationtalk
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quote:
ORIGINAL: mrtigger
If a guy proposed with an engagement ring which he tells you is diamond but it really isn't (like Cubic Zirconia or similar) and you later found out the truth about it, what would you do?
Be hurt?? End the relationship? Accept it anyway?? Or what??
Would you be ok with a CZ ring if he was up front regarding what the ring was made from??
Last first: I think that I would be hurt that he valued me so little that he would give me a CZ rather than a gem stone. It doesn't have to be an expensive ring/stone, just something that shows he thought about ME when he got it...something that fits with what I wear/like, something that had a special meaning to us, my favorite stone, what ever...
If he lied to me about the stone... I would absolutely be hurt...then if it were before the wedding when I found out, then Yeah, I might very well end the relationship. If he will lie about something as minor as a rock, then he's likely going to lie about things that are truly important. I've been lied to enough...don't need more. If we were already married when I found out, I wouldn't end the relationship because I'd made vows, but it would definitely damage my trust...and trust is very hard to rebuild.
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RE: Cubic Zirconia wedding ring??? - 10/21/2008 11:40:47 PM
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p31woman
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quote:
Be hurt?? End the relationship? Accept it anyway?? Or what??
I might end the relationship. If I didn't, we'd definitely be postponing the wedding and getting into some serious premarital counseling. That kind of dishonesty would be completely unacceptable.
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Would you be ok with a CZ ring if he was up front regarding what the ring was made from??
Personally, I'd rather have a semi-precious stone (like aquamarine or garnet) than a simulated diamond (CZ) if money were an issue.
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RE: Cubic Zirconia wedding ring??? - 10/22/2008 4:56:32 AM
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RamiRedeemed
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Hahaha! I'd leave the guy AND tell everyone how cheap he is. If he can't afford a diamond, a large large diamond, he can't afford to be married. After all, the engagement ring is supposed to cost three months of his salary, I could hope he can get more than cz in three months.
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RE: Cubic Zirconia wedding ring??? - 10/22/2008 3:52:18 PM
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OneOfHisJewels
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From: California
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quote:
Personally, I would rather have had a small diamond than a large CZ. To me, there is symbolism in having the real thing, however small. That's just personal preference, though.
Bethany, your ring isn't a cubic zirconia is it? I wouldn't think so..Brian seems like the type that would buy you the real thing and he was financially well established.
I think you you were just speaking hypothetically, but from the wording, I was just confused and just wondering.
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RE: Cubic Zirconia wedding ring??? - 10/22/2008 4:00:14 PM
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WhiteRoseBlessings
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The lying would bother me and I would seriously consider ending the relationship.
However, having said that . . . any man who was wanting to put a ring on my finger would also know that the stone wouldn't have to be a diamond . . . turquoise and coral were the stones of my wedding ring when CS and I were married - AND I was the one who picked out the ring.
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RE: Cubic Zirconia wedding ring??? - 10/22/2008 9:08:45 PM
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kimberlysfrog
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The lying would be the issue for me. I don't care what the stone is, it's the symbolism and the love behind it.
My husband was smart enough to not get me a diamond or gold; instead he purchased a pretty silver ring with my birthstone, the peridot. And my wedding ring is a beautiful sterling silver ring from Bob Siemens designs.
Honesty is a huge issue, if he lied about that to make himself look good or because he was afraid of her reaction, there's a big problem there that's going to extend to every other area of his marriage and his life.
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RE: Cubic Zirconia wedding ring??? - 10/22/2008 11:48:11 PM
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solo_soprano22
Posts: 2446
Joined: 4/27/2005
From: I'm a Southern girl
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quote:
ORIGINAL: creationtalk
quote:
ORIGINAL: mrtigger
If a guy proposed with an engagement ring which he tells you is diamond but it really isn't (like Cubic Zirconia or similar) and you later found out the truth about it, what would you do?
Be hurt?? End the relationship? Accept it anyway?? Or what??
Would you be ok with a CZ ring if he was up front regarding what the ring was made from??
Last first: I think that I would be hurt that he valued me so little that he would give me a CZ rather than a gem stone. It doesn't have to be an expensive ring/stone, just something that shows he thought about ME when he got it...something that fits with what I wear/like, something that had a special meaning to us, my favorite stone, what ever...
If he lied to me about the stone... I would absolutely be hurt...then if it were before the wedding when I found out, then Yeah, I might very well end the relationship. If he will lie about something as minor as a rock, then he's likely going to lie about things that are truly important. I've been lied to enough...don't need more. If we were already married when I found out, I wouldn't end the relationship because I'd made vows, but it would definitely damage my trust...and trust is very hard to rebuild.
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RE: Cubic Zirconia wedding ring??? - 10/22/2008 11:50:47 PM
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Hislittleone
Posts: 628
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quote:
Be hurt?? End the relationship? Accept it anyway?? Or what??
I'd be very hurt and would consider ending the relationship. I wouldn't accept it even if we did stay together because I'd want a genuine gemstone and it would always remind me of his deception.
quote:
Would you be ok with a CZ ring if he was up front regarding what the ring was made from??
Nope. I'd rather have a small diamond or some other less expensive stone than a CZ.
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RE: Cubic Zirconia wedding ring??? - 10/23/2008 12:03:09 AM
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rgod
Posts: 1770
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quote:
ORIGINAL: WhiteRoseBlessings
The lying would bother me and I would seriously consider ending the relationship.
However, having said that . . . any man who was wanting to put a ring on my finger would also know that the stone wouldn't have to be a diamond . . . turquoise and coral were the stones of my wedding ring when CS and I were married - AND I was the one who picked out the ring.
WhiteRoseBlessings - that sounds like an absolutely beautiful ring. I was thinking a bit about wedding rings before I read this thread and was wondering if people wore any other types of stones other than diamond. I think turquoise and coral must have been so beautiful!
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RE: Cubic Zirconia wedding ring??? - 10/23/2008 11:51:38 AM
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mrtigger
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Thanks all for your replies.
Personally, if I were female, I'd prefer colored gemstones myself. I find diamonds to be colorless and boring. Rubies, emeralds, etc are much more attractive stones..
Anyway, since the OP, the guy has proposed, and she said yes but I don't know if he told her the ring is CZ. However I know he was told that he had better be honest with her about it.
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RE: Cubic Zirconia wedding ring??? - 10/23/2008 11:01:41 PM
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Prairiehiker
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I'm with everyone who said that lying and deceipt would probably hurt and a potential deal breaker. But I would still give the guy a chance to explain...maybe he's insecure about his masculinity. Maybe he feels that he has to provide her with a ring. Maybe your friend did something, like she went on and on about a diamond ring, that he felt pressured to lie about it. He's human. It's not an excuse, but I'd have to really know what was going on in the guy's mind when he purchased then lied about it.
I guess I'm not really into things like that--rings and fancy weddings. A man can marry me without any of those and we can instead save the money for our honeymoon, you know, like going on a 3 month backpacking trip to South America or Australia or Europe. I'd prefer that over any ring any time.
< Message edited by Prairiehiker -- 10/23/2008 11:42:06 PM >
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RE: Cubic Zirconia wedding ring??? - 10/24/2008 5:20:43 AM
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agapetos
Posts: 5553
Joined: 4/11/2005
From: This side of the lil duck pond!
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quote:
ORIGINAL: rgod
quote:
ORIGINAL: WhiteRoseBlessings
The lying would bother me and I would seriously consider ending the relationship.
However, having said that . . . any man who was wanting to put a ring on my finger would also know that the stone wouldn't have to be a diamond . . . turquoise and coral were the stones of my wedding ring when CS and I were married - AND I was the one who picked out the ring.
WhiteRoseBlessings - that sounds like an absolutely beautiful ring. I was thinking a bit about wedding rings before I read this thread and was wondering if people wore any other types of stones other than diamond. I think turquoise and coral must have been so beautiful!
I agree!
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RE: Cubic Zirconia wedding ring??? - 10/24/2008 7:25:31 AM
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car2ner
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quote:
Personally, if I were female, I'd prefer colored gemstones myself. I find diamonds to be colorless and boring. Rubies, emeralds, etc are much more attractive stones..
I have a heart shaped diamond and it sparkles beautifully! My wedding ring has a wrap around band with a small diamond and a sapphire on each side of the diamond. BTW< trying to find a wedding band that goes with a heart shaped diamond takes some shopping around.
That is my only really expensive piece of jewelry. I am not into big bucks for diamonds, etc, when some costume pieces are quite lovely.
But honesty is more important than any piece of jewelry. I would want to know why the lie before any decision was made but the lie would be a huge red flag.
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RE: Cubic Zirconia wedding ring??? - 10/24/2008 7:43:37 AM
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WhiteRoseBlessings
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quote:
ORIGINAL: car2ner
quote:
Personally, if I were female, I'd prefer colored gemstones myself. I find diamonds to be colorless and boring. Rubies, emeralds, etc are much more attractive stones..
I have a heart shaped diamond and it sparkles beautifully! I meant to address the "colorless" in a previous post . . . I have seen some exquisite diamonds before that had a lot of fire and brilliance to them, refracting literally a rainbow of color.
I'm not sure, but I think it all depends upon the quality and cut of the diamond, itself . . . doesn't it?
Car2ner, heart-shaped diamonds are very pretty. They've got both angles and curves working with them in the cut.
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