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ORIGINAL: rgod

I'm thankful that I was able to spend time with other believers today. Usually when I go to church, it is kind of isolating. I'm a friendly person, so I usually get to know people and they usually know me on the surface. I've been in so many churches where I love the preaching and the music - but I feel like I don't really get close to people on a personal level. I can go to bible study with them or even serve with them - or maybe even do some sort of fellowship. But I get tired of church as usual - the picnics, the potlucks, the politicking. Everything is so geared internally you know - how can I serve the people inside of my local body, how can I teach the kids here, how can I reach the women here. I don't think there is anything wrong with this - we have to do this and it blesses people. I've been blessed by ministries like these. And of course, I like to eat as much as the next person and to have fun fellowship too. This is great to do. But so many times I look around and say to myself - is this what Jesus died for? Was it for me to sit in the church kitchen, eating pasta salad or trying to figure out how to raise money for a building fund? Or going to the nursing home once a week? Again, I don't think there is anything wrong with these things at all - it is good to fellowship, we need a place to meet, we are called to help the poor, needy, and our elders. But for myself, I feel such a hunger to know and understand what Jesus is doing globally - and I want to join with people who are thinking the same way - are looking at how to pray and connect and bless - whether it is down the street or in another country. I want to see people saved and lives changed - inside and particularly outside of the church. And I want to see churches truly equip the saints in all of the gifts - not just the ones that are not controversial (like service or mercy). I want to see people released into their calls.

Well, let me get to my thank you. This weekend I was blessed to meet some women who were transparent. We sat through a class together, but could just talk - people shared some things - and we prayed and just spoke to one another. Very little surfacey stuff - more deep things. It was so nice to be able to know people and to be known. And we studied the gifts together - and learned how to use them. We "practiced" using them so that we could go out - outside of the church and inside of the church and use our gifts. What a blessing! And we studied the bible. And ate together. And we talked about the end times - about the things that the Lord is doing all around the world. We prayed together. We talked about heaven and rewards and judgement - we praised and worshipped Jesus.

I don't know if I'll see all of these women again, but it just ministered to me so much that I didn't want to even leave. But eventually I had to go. It was so good - but right now in the absence of all that - I'm feeling kind of sad and alone. But I'm still thankful that I've been able to have this - even if it has been for a short while.